OH NO! Pitman's left the ASL forum in a huff...AGAIN!

Glennbo

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Pitman is shunning the ASL forum once again. He got somebody to post a thread for him because he simply can't bear it here...not even enough to promote his own self! The disgust for this place is so intense he uses a surrogate poster! (Desperation Morale Update thread).

His ASL expertise will be lost to us all, even the innocent! No, no, please not the innocent as well!

Unless...

Let us figure out how we can get him to come back. First we must point the "finger of blame". WHO is the insensitive devil who drove him away this time, just like the last time, unless this is maybe the final last time, unlike all the other times:

1) Is it that good old standby, the general "Poisonous Atmosphere" here?

2) Because Jazz our heartless Moderator moved his pertinent ASL thread into the forum "wasteland" known as Community Chit-Chat...probably where this one will wind up too...(I'LL LEAVE! I SWEAR!) without his permission?

3) Is it Dorosh's constant life-draining stalking?

4) Could it be Psycho's irreverent thread hijacking? I mean Pitman has all these deep thoughts and this idiot dares break up the concentrated ruminations!

5) Maybe it was Glennbo's snarky, mean-spirited responses to his stupid ideas fueled by a multitude of anti-Pitman rep points from an invisible army of frustrated forumites? Or the tasteless, disrespectful, "indifferent to the feelings of others" threads Glennbo starts..such as this very one?

6) Did forum members X cubed not treat his free of charge magnanamous wisdom with the unquestioned adoration it deserves? C'mon you ingrates. 'Fess up!

7) Was it Gunner Scott's unending needling, eroding year after year the very soul of our beloved?

8) ALL OF THE ABOVE???

One thing is clear. This ASL forum is a flop without him. It sucks. I can't believe it's even still still up and running. I mean what's it been? Days now? He knows this, and by turning his back upon us all we are left to ponder this vast emptiness of our own making. Oh how we regret! Oh how our remorse stings and burns! Can we change? Can we become worthy?

Yes! We can become worthy. This thread is for new ideas to make Pitman feel welcome again on the ASL forum. And this time we'll really mean it. Not like all the other times he left and we couldn't have cared less and so did nothing.

What must be done to make this dreary place whole again? Seriously, let's get the big lug back here. This is the time to make your pro-Pitman pitch. Plead. Beg. I don't care how much you have to grovel, just do it! And let's get this forum rolling again.

I'll start. Pitman...gee this is hard...Pitman, I'm sorry for everything. Even this very thread, which could possibly be construed as only adding to the list of wrongs I've done. Please forgive. Me. For...Please...ohhhww...I can't go on...:upset: :cry:
This is what should be going on here. Talking about how to bring Pitman back.

But nnoooooo

What we get is the precise opposite of what would attract Pitman. Which in of itself is a statement.
 

Roadtogundagai

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This is what should be going on here... Which in of itself is a statement.
Quoting yourself at length is mildly perverse. An odd form of masturbation - rather like whacking off to internet porn while talking to your mother on the phone - it might feel good, but deep down you know it isn't quite right.

I care significantly more about the grooming of the abnormally large amounts of hair that sprouts out of my buttcrack than about Mr Pitman's return. Life is full of opinionated windbags who can only tolerate views that match their own. Such closed minds are of no interest to me at all. The return of the plague would be preferable than the return of Pitman.
 

horseshoe

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Quoting yourself at length is mildly perverse. An odd form of masturbation - rather like whacking off to internet porn while talking to your mother on the phone - it might feel good, but deep down you know it isn't quite right.

I care significantly more about the grooming of the abnormally large amounts of hair that sprouts out of my buttcrack than about Mr Pitman's return. Life is full of opinionated windbags who can only tolerate views that match their own. Such closed minds are of no interest to me at all. The return of the plague would be preferable than the return of Pitman.
All i can say is, Wow........:crosseye:
 

Kevin Kenneally

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This is what should be going on here. Talking about how to bring Pitman back.

But nnoooooo

What we get is the precise opposite of what would attract Pitman. Which in of itself is a statement.

Glennbo,

Padding the Post count is MY "forte"....... Ask Sarfs if you think differently......
 
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