Dummies and their lies

Justiciar

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@Tater

What if in a game between you and I -- my HIP'd SFCP observer has become unconcealed in an out-of-the way corner where you won't have a decent shot at him for a while. So being a crafty resourceful Tater, you have repositioned your 6SAN Sniper counter over this game critical threat of mine... he's the nearest unit in six hexes in all directions and the next hot or warm SA can't NOT hit him. Damn I wish I'd seen this coming... oh wait, I did... So, in this no-vehicles scenario where the NOBA is seriously significant... I'll now take my dummy captured german prime-mover or motorcycles-with-sidecars (I'm playing the Marines, FYI) all loaded up with dummy SMC passenger/riders and I'll run them over to the foot of my OBA observers hill to act as sniper sponges? This nice thing about this is I didn't have to put any dummies or real units at a reasonable distance from the observer at set up which would make my observer's hideout easier to find, in fact I used them as decoy at the position your Japanese were desperately trying to reach... but needed on the other side of the board they can get there on the roads where they need to be to soak up the sniper fire. And they moved just like real units (just 'real units' that couldn't possibly actually show up in this scenario).

This all strikes me as pure abuse of the dummy rules. And speaking of abuse -- I'm gonna rain Naval OBA down upon your men like an Old Testament God on a bad day.

Here's the only limitation on dummy movement I can find in the rulebook -- "A stack of Dummies containing no real unit may be moved as if it contains a real unit (even to the extent of being able to move with leader/Double Time MF bonuses)."

Sadly the index does not define "real unit." In fact, it fails to define many words and common phrases in the English language we would be expected to agree on if we weren't ASL players. Lousy Rule Book.

Me, I think defining a "real unit" as any unit in any module anywhere is just ludicrous -- can I use PTO dummy fakes in the ETO or vice versa? Can I use 1945 MP in a 1936 scenario? Can I use third party provider units? Would I have to own a physical unit counter or just know about them?

Defining a 'real unit' as: a unit that could really appear in the game you are playing based on the Scenario Card you are using is such an obvious call I honestly can't believe I need to defend it! Dummy units (that want to move) need to move like a real unit: a unit that could move in that game, for real.
You could of course have foreseen this, and used one of your own dummy stacks to be held in reserve so as to move over to act as a soak for the sniper vs your SFCP or any other reposition target as you see it. The dummy ploy and counter dummy ploy-ploy can go on at will. You have to let this go Specialist Pyth. It will not happen at the rate you see it coming. Furthermore, your hyper-aware state about it will keep you extra extra vigilant and when concealed stacks move you will take every*** opportunity to string the free LOS check to strip away the offending MC-and sidecar you hear roaring towards you back field. Concentrate on the myriad of other factors which will matter well before this beta-noir comes home to roost in order to win.
 

von Marwitz

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Too much wine Herr Major.
ACHTUNG!
It is Oberst von Marwitz, not Major!

And this seems not the only time that your attention is found lacking:
There cannot be too much wine. There can only be too much whining.

That said, wine exists that I find lacking. But before you begin to dwell on whether my previous remark relates to wine and/or whining, let be regale you with some sound advice: In such cases it is recommendable to have provisioned oneself at least with a couple of casks of Champange until the situation has been amended.

von Marwitz
 

Justiciar

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ACHTUNG!
It is Oberst von Marwitz, not Major!

And this seems not the only time that your attention is found lacking:
There cannot be too much wine. There can only be too much whining.

That said, wine exists that I find lacking. But before you begin to dwell on whether my previous remark relates to wine and/or whining, let be regale you with some sound advice: In such cases it is recommendable to have provisioned oneself at least with a couple of casks of Champange until the situation has been amended.

von Marwitz
According to records I have in hand you were demoted for failure to properly recall a meeting engagement you were involved in, not something an Oberst <cough> should forget, lest not one in which they fancifully prance a dummy stack into the enemy's 2nd echelon to deny concealment, and when engaging an an inept enemy who did not enter concealed. Your are hardly instructor material are you? Well maybe on the boot polishing and uniform pressing course, and knife and fork etiquette. Furthermore, you are clearly in violation of uniform and should have your avatar rank adjusted accordingly. We shall close the matter forthwith. I need not remind you that my title is akin to JAG... albeit in a civilian world, so call it civilian oversight. I shall be passing on to the Commiserate your mention of casks of Champagne to see if those were properly obtained and accounted for, or as I suspect were obtained off the record and thus subject to judicial reprimand. You may yet see the Russian Front again as a company commander. Good evening for now Herr Major.
 

von Marwitz

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According to records I have in hand you were demoted for failure to properly recall a meeting engagement you were involved in, not something an Oberst <cough> should forget, lest not one in which they fancifully prance a dummy stack into the enemy's 2nd echelon to deny concealment, and when engaging an an inept enemy who did not enter concealed. Your are hardly instructor material are you? Well maybe on the boot polishing and uniform pressing course, and knife and fork etiquette. Furthermore, you are clearly in violation of uniform and should have your avatar rank adjusted accordingly. We shall close the matter forthwith. I need not remind you that my title is akin to JAG... albeit in a civilian world, so call it civilian oversight. I shall be passing on to the Commiserate your mention of casks of Champagne to see if those were properly obtained and accounted for, or as I suspect were obtained off the record and thus subject to judicial reprimand. You may yet see the Russian Front again as a company commander. Good evening for now Herr Major.

Bah! Now you are muckraking to bring up that staff-intrigue of Major von Schoff and his Goldfasan friends in Berlin to impede my career. His meddling was in vain as I was cleared of all charges before the Kriegsgericht and retain my rank. Instructor material? You seem to live in the world of Unteroffiziere and cherish fraternization, don't you? Boot polishing an uniform pressing are duties of my orderly and nothing to waste my talents on. Knife and fork etiquette and much beyond should not be a necessity of military education but already imbued as a matter of course to offsping of any bloodline worth the mention.

The "uniform" of my avatar displays the Iron Cross to bear witness of my merit. Whereas you seem to be wearing the uniform of the enemy - I cannot tell if this might be in preparation to defect or if you are one of that questionable Skorzeny's men bulging around. So, please do spare me any ramblings about violation of uniform, will you?

My casks of champagne are spoils of war and your miserable attempts at blackmailing will prove futile. Focussing on my casks of champange in these times displays your lack of vision for the geater picture. A predicate that must be seen as a prerequisite for any officer. But then, you might as well adhere to your paragraphs if this smallish niggling is where your talents lie.

A good evening it will be for me Leutnant. Or should I say Lieutenant?


von Marwitz
 
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Justiciar

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Alas none of this is staff driven. It is a matter for Internal Affairs. Best I see it, do pack for cold winters... My talents lie beyond the moldy casks in your horde. Drink up while you still can.
 

Tater

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Defining a 'real unit' as: a unit that could really appear in the game you are playing based on the Scenario Card you are using is such an obvious call I honestly can't believe I need to defend it! Dummy units (that want to move) need to move like a real unit: a unit that could move in that game, for real.
"what if"...yawn...
 
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