Major Issues
Elder Member
I have been busy searching for a new career, but I took some time off to go to Walter Kenney’s ASL Bash. I have picked up a few job hunting tips that I thought I would share to keep you from making the same mistakes as me:
Don’t share that you are a member of Gamer’s Anonymous – ‘My name is Major Issues, and it has been three days since I last dropped dice.’
Don’t list Cary Grant and Dee Snider as references.
Under ‘Achievement You Are Most Proud Of’, don’t write ‘Instituted Program of Ideological Reeducation’.
Under ‘Latest Meaningful Achievement’, don’t write ‘Built a 14 satellite dish array in my backyard to monitor alien transmissions.’
I got to play a game after lunch against Xenovin. He was flush with victory after his first game, so I suckered him into playing Roses for Vandervoort. This has been on my list a while, and since it was short and topical (Normandy), it fit the bill. I had a setup for the Germans. There is some arts-and-crafts work pregame, as there are a lot of bocage overlays to put down.
Small German infantry force with two 20mm flak guns and two old 75s are defending the village against paratroopers with two 81 mortars, plus two Shermans as reinforcements.
A mostly SK player, Peter, said he wanted to watch. I told him I wasn’t into kinky stuff, and, besides, it might cause me to have performance anxiety. He clarified that he just wanted to watch the game. I reiterated that it might cause me to have performance anxiety...
Game starts with Xenovin attempting, and failing, to move both of his 81 MTRs. He did not take it as the ominous portent of doom that it surely was.
Xenovin always tries to figure out which stacks are dummies. I did have one dummy stack, but he incorrectly guessed it was my upfront stack. Which was a 237. Which he moved adjacent to. Repeatedly. And who got off 3 shots, including FPF, breaking one squad and killing a HS.
With my HS now revealed, he moved a giant pile of guys across a hedgerow. Into an open ground hex in LOS of a 20L AA. After they were shot up, the other 20L AA opened up from the other direction.
He ended up with a dead 8-0 and three broken squads. In my excitement, I forgot that the 2nd shot was Encircling Fire, so it could have been worse.
A2, I lose the heroic HS in CC. G2, I lose one AA gun crew when I roll a 12 on a MC.
American problems continue, as an active sniper broke one mortar crew and a paratrooper squad, and pinned another squad.
A3, smoke grenades allow some paratroopers to get into the killing field without a -2 drm from the AA gun. But I roll snakes to toast one squad with my HMG, and the AA gun breaks another when the smoke clears.
Walter’s wife and granddaughter came home, and retired to a room so the granddaughter could paint Grandma’s toenails. I wanted her to do mine also, but there just wasn’t time.
One Sherman that approached the village was dealt with by a 75 in the harshest of manners, as smoke from the flaming wreck could be seen for miles.
A Gust roll spreads the blaze to the wooden building along the American’s approach. A paratrooper squad goes after the 20L AA, and is broken. The remaining Sherman moved up to try to challenge the 9-1 and HMG behind the bocage. Weeks of intense training, the kind that only the Wehrmacht can give, paid off with a panzerfaust hit and another flaming wreck. The squad then fired the HMG to break a flanking 337. There was a brief break in the action while I took the time to hand out Iron Crosses.
Xenovin throws in the towel. I have lost a squad, light mortar and AA gun. He has lost both tanks and several squads, and isn’t really close to taking a victory building. The line of blazing wrecks/ houses made his mortars useless. Two 75s and a HMG were going to make further progress difficult.
This is fairly even on ROAR. I had fun. Xenovin, much less so.
I told Peter than he brought me luck, and that he could watch me anytime. He said that he wasn't into kinky stuff...
...but he was willing to learn...
Don’t share that you are a member of Gamer’s Anonymous – ‘My name is Major Issues, and it has been three days since I last dropped dice.’
Don’t list Cary Grant and Dee Snider as references.
Under ‘Achievement You Are Most Proud Of’, don’t write ‘Instituted Program of Ideological Reeducation’.
Under ‘Latest Meaningful Achievement’, don’t write ‘Built a 14 satellite dish array in my backyard to monitor alien transmissions.’
I got to play a game after lunch against Xenovin. He was flush with victory after his first game, so I suckered him into playing Roses for Vandervoort. This has been on my list a while, and since it was short and topical (Normandy), it fit the bill. I had a setup for the Germans. There is some arts-and-crafts work pregame, as there are a lot of bocage overlays to put down.
Small German infantry force with two 20mm flak guns and two old 75s are defending the village against paratroopers with two 81 mortars, plus two Shermans as reinforcements.
A mostly SK player, Peter, said he wanted to watch. I told him I wasn’t into kinky stuff, and, besides, it might cause me to have performance anxiety. He clarified that he just wanted to watch the game. I reiterated that it might cause me to have performance anxiety...
Game starts with Xenovin attempting, and failing, to move both of his 81 MTRs. He did not take it as the ominous portent of doom that it surely was.
Xenovin always tries to figure out which stacks are dummies. I did have one dummy stack, but he incorrectly guessed it was my upfront stack. Which was a 237. Which he moved adjacent to. Repeatedly. And who got off 3 shots, including FPF, breaking one squad and killing a HS.
With my HS now revealed, he moved a giant pile of guys across a hedgerow. Into an open ground hex in LOS of a 20L AA. After they were shot up, the other 20L AA opened up from the other direction.
He ended up with a dead 8-0 and three broken squads. In my excitement, I forgot that the 2nd shot was Encircling Fire, so it could have been worse.
A2, I lose the heroic HS in CC. G2, I lose one AA gun crew when I roll a 12 on a MC.
American problems continue, as an active sniper broke one mortar crew and a paratrooper squad, and pinned another squad.
A3, smoke grenades allow some paratroopers to get into the killing field without a -2 drm from the AA gun. But I roll snakes to toast one squad with my HMG, and the AA gun breaks another when the smoke clears.
Walter’s wife and granddaughter came home, and retired to a room so the granddaughter could paint Grandma’s toenails. I wanted her to do mine also, but there just wasn’t time.
One Sherman that approached the village was dealt with by a 75 in the harshest of manners, as smoke from the flaming wreck could be seen for miles.
A Gust roll spreads the blaze to the wooden building along the American’s approach. A paratrooper squad goes after the 20L AA, and is broken. The remaining Sherman moved up to try to challenge the 9-1 and HMG behind the bocage. Weeks of intense training, the kind that only the Wehrmacht can give, paid off with a panzerfaust hit and another flaming wreck. The squad then fired the HMG to break a flanking 337. There was a brief break in the action while I took the time to hand out Iron Crosses.
Xenovin throws in the towel. I have lost a squad, light mortar and AA gun. He has lost both tanks and several squads, and isn’t really close to taking a victory building. The line of blazing wrecks/ houses made his mortars useless. Two 75s and a HMG were going to make further progress difficult.
This is fairly even on ROAR. I had fun. Xenovin, much less so.
I told Peter than he brought me luck, and that he could watch me anytime. He said that he wasn't into kinky stuff...
...but he was willing to learn...
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