AAR - Meatchoppers With Knives - RPT167

Major Issues

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Apr 27, 2018
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Secane, PA
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llUnited States
I recently changed jobs, and thought that I would pass on some useful advice that may help you. Show up at the interview with a box that says “HUMAN ORGAN.”

Ask if you can go first, as you are on your way to the trauma center to do kidney transplant surgery. Under no circumstances let anyone look inside the box. If they find out it contains a ham sandwich and a Diet Coke, you’re screwed. (I state this from experience...)

Walt wanted to play a Korean scenario. I picked Meatchoppers With Knives. Walt had a mix of French and Korean infantry, plus two American meatchoppers.
Sorry, a different meatchopper.

I commanded the Chinese Whore.


Sorry, that should have been Horde.

Chinese win immediately if they get 7 points, or at game end if they have 4 points. They get one point for each of three hill hexes that they can set up on. The other points come from controlling stone buildings in the village. There are 5 buildings.

The UN forces get the two M16s and four elite French squads as reinforcements on turn 1.

The Godless Communists do get some fun toys – a MMG, a light and heavy mortar, a RCL, a BAZ 44, and an AC/DC. All is not peaches and rice, however. The Chinese infantry is a mix of totally kick-ass, awesome 437s and 4(1)7s, or, as I call them, ‘Men with Pointy Sticks.’


They have only one leader and one Political Officer, who I expected to spend most of his time rallying scum who are a disgrace to Our Leader, and handing out propaganda literature from the Bernie Sanders campaign. A buncha scrubs and an 8-0 come in as reinforcements.

On board 57, Walt had one squad in the middle, a HS with a light mortar in the back, and a pile defending the one stone building in the rear. He later said that he expected me to go for that building. If I could get it and hold it, that would be my 4 points. This didn’t look appetizing to me, as it would involve three turns of charging across hectares of open ground and paddy fields, with his reinforcements entering in my face on turn 1.

On board 70 were the rest of the UN force. I thought he could have done better with his setup. The RCL was in a building, ‘cause he forget about the backblast, and the 9-2 and his Merry Men were in a stone building in the rear, where they had terrible LOS.

Most of the Chinese crew-served weapons were on the hill on board 61. I stuck the RCL on the back of the hill on board 44. The Chinese infantry all set up to charge down the right flank of board 70.

Except for the two recon squads on the left side of the road, the rest of the Chinese Horde did the Amoeba Impulse Move on the right flank on turn 1. I did not CX. Considering the number of shots they were receiving in open ground, it went pretty well. One squad striped, and several pinned. My reinforcements chugged down the road on board 57, to occupy the hill in case of a UN counterattack.

The French light mortar starts plinking away at the Chinese 82mm mortar. I had set this up where I thought he couldn’t see it, but there weren’t quite enough spruces to block LOS. The picket squad, firing at long range with a 2-1/2 +2, rolls a 3 and stripes the mortar crew. Heavy sigh.

UN1, a couple squads come in to reinforce the stone building on board 57, which I thought was odd, considering that no one was heading that direction. One M16 set up way back on board 57. The other parked on my right flank on board 70, to repel the horde with Chuck Norris 24 FP and 2 ROF. Walt fires a 12+1 in the Advancing Fire Phase. He rolls a 12.

Walt realizes his RCL mistake and backs it up into the middle of the road. It’s a French thing. You wouldn’t understand.

I break, wound, and ELR a French 7-0. In case you have missed the trend in all of my previous AARs, Walt rolls a LOT of 12s. It’s a gift.

C2, there are three squads the Horde can charge, two of which are in victory buildings. One squad fails its NTC to move, but everyone else either passes or does not need to make one. This helps, because some of the Horde is only facing residual fire. Walt’s 9-2 Kill Stack takes a shot, and, continuing Walt’s tale of woe with 9-2s, rolls a 12 and breaks the MMG.

Piles of Chinese pour into the three buildings. In the two victory buildings, I get Ambush and murder the French defenders. The building on the far right, I do not get Ambush with my three squads, and blow a 2:1 -1 in HtH combat.


UN2, Walt repairs his M16 HT. He decides to blast at the adjacent HtH Melee hex, at 48+2. Okay, 36, but only because there is no IIIFT. Two of my squads stripe and ELR and one pins, but his squad breaks. Hard to believe that they were unnerved by fire from one of their allies. The fact that a M16 crew member was heard to be screaming. “KILL THEM ALL AND LET GOD SORT THEM OUT!!!!!!!!” probably did not help their morale. Predictably, his squad dies trying to withdraw from HtH CC. I needed to roll a 13.

Elsewhere, I break his HS with the RCL in the middle of the road by shooting at them from an adjacent hex. Hard to believe, but true.

C3, my RCL gets HEAT and a hit on the M16, totally ruining their day.

I make my push to cross the street and kill more French troops. Kill, KILL, KILL!!!!!! Being so close, I don’t have to worry about taking NTCs to move. Moving one at a time into the street is the wise move, and should get me across with only a few stripes.


Walt gets hot dice. Chinese guys are being murdered left and right. The 9-0 and his DC-toting squad get pinned in the street before they can heave the DC at the 9-2. I manage to get three squads into the building with the 9-2, but he gets Ambush and kills them. All of them. Three squads. Poof. I lost 7 squads this player turn, to 4-1 and 2-2 shots, and in CC.

The Mortar Brawl on the hill continues. As the Chinese, you have to worry about breakage, with B11. You also have to wonder when you will get any kewl ammo, as neither Chinese mortar has smoke or WP. The UN mortar continues to plink away. Some turns Walt would get 7-8 shots off. But it would be, “TH 3, Effects 11.” Repeat, and repeat, and repeat.

UN3, Walt breaks the Political Officer (Comrade Lo Mein) and his DC squad in the street as they are handing out literature from Bernie Sanders for Change In America. He decides to jump an adjacent 437 squad with the 9-2 and coupla guys. He gets ambush, and I lose another squad.

C4, it is evident that Walt will make no push for my hill, so I decide to boldly/ stupidly charge down with the infantry squads. I don’t want to use Impulse Movement, so the three squads will need to take TCs. All three fail, and they sit down and start brewing tea. Just wait until I do their employee reviews. The remaining three squads with an 8-0 come down off the hill.

I break a 7-0 and squad and chase them out of a stone building. I am one building away from instant victory!!! But, I have been getting murdered, and am down to a handful of troops in the village, most of which are 2nd line HSs with their intimidating 1 FP.

I get two Men With Sticks squads into CC with the 9-2, who again ambushes me and kills both of them. The Chinese bodies are stacking up like cordwood in this hex.

UN4, a shot at my pile that had come down the hill results in the 8-0 breaking. At this point, I have no good order leaders. The other M16, which has been plinking at the hill at super long range with 6+2s, decides to move behind the village. Some of the troops defending the board 57 stone building decide to shift sideways to help out the desperate troops in town. My light mortar finally wakes up, gets a hit, and breaks both squads.

C5, my broken 8-0 fails his self rally attempt. By a lot. Like, a 12. And then fails his wound check.

My light mortar puts a round down the chimney, obliterating one French squad. He follows it up with another CH on the big pile of guys in the rear. Not as good a result, but it still CRs a broken squad. Who rolls a 12 on his next rally attempt...

One Chinese squad boldly chases after Walt’s broken 7-0 and squad to DM them, but gets pinned along the way. It doesn’t matter, because Walt failed both the 7-0 self rally and the squad self rally his next turn.

My three squads that had come down off the hill split up, with one running across acres of open ground up board 57, mostly to draw fire. He actually makes it. The other two aim for the village. Walt kills one with a 2-2 from an LMG. He kills the other with a 1-2 residual in the same hex. Meanwhile, in the village, Walt’s 9-2 continues to roll 10s and 11s.

Although I am continuing to make feeble, half-hearted attempts towards one stone building, my best chance for victory is just to hold on to one of the three I occupy in the village. But I am so, so weak – one building is being held by a 127, and one by a 237.

The M16 gets killed by a LMG. Neither of the M16s was very effective, and they never got ROF. The 237 that fired gets ambushed and killed in CC. Another squad gets ambushed and killed by the 9-2 pile.

C6, the Chinese MMG breaks the picket squad on board 57. I can actually make a play for two stone buildings, as I can charge one squad to the board 57 building, and advance a 127 into one stone building on board 70 that is defended by a 237. My board 57 charge ends badly. My HtH CC on board 70 just results in more Chinese bodies.

UN6, and Walt needs to take back two stone buildings. One building is defended by a 437, the other by Comrade Lo Mein with a 127. A 127 HS and a 128 crew get tossed out in the street to help block access. Reaching deep into the back of the rulebook, Walt decides that he wants to do a Bayonet Charge with the 9-2 and two squads.


To do a Bayonet Charge, the leader must pass a NTC. The 9-2, remembering horror stories that his father told about Ypres, fails, and is pinned. The two squads go into the street without him. Where my AFHH (Anti-French Hunter Hero), a 127 HS with a DC, flings the DC at them. It explodes like a Chinese fireworks factory, both squads break, and Walt concedes. My victorious troops celebrate by partying with a Chinese whore!!!


Walt did have a lot of bad rolls this game, but I had my share, especially in CC. After turn 2, I never caused any casualties in CC, while losing about 8 squads. About half of these were HtH, and all had the Chinese -1 drm. Walt was terrified that I would get a low roll with a garbage HS and take out a whole stack of French.

This is a good one. There are so many different ways to play it. The UN can actually set up close to the hill, and maybe make a play to take back the hill hexes. The M16s could go after the hill, and at least control 2 hexes, if they survive. The Chinese can grab one building, then just try to defend that one the rest of the game.

End of game pic below. Not shown is the Pin counter on the 9-2. This pic was taken before the DC exploded. The board was too covered with dismembered limbs and Walt’s tears to get a good picture afterwards.



Jul 5, 2006
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llUnited States
Great and fun AAR. However, Walt should have dug a little deeper in the rules, and the bayonet charge should have gone forward. Per W.6A and W5.2, French leaders are exempt from Bayonet Charge NTC.